A look at the beginning of my journey of Motherhood

Since I was a girl, Ive been fond of babies and kids. When I was 11, our little cousin used to spend the whole day with us while his parents went to work. We took care of him for the first 2 years. That was probably my first proper experience of being with a baby and handling small things about it, learning on-the-job; as I was only 3 when my brother was born and don't really think I registered him much as a baby :)
Around 7 years later, we had another little baby coming over for the day while his parents were working: he was our family friends' son, and I was much older by then to understand the nitty-gritties of childcare. Although my mother, who I guess had ample experience bringing up 2 children and 2 dogs, did most of the job; I attribute to these experiences giving me a taste of what baby care is all about, and in its own way, prepared me to take up the responsibility myself when the time came.

However, I still had a mental block with the whole process: first trying forever to conceive, while ensuring everything is ideal for it to happen. Then managing 9 months of pregnancy and all that comes with it: sickness, aches, drastic lifestyle changes etc. Then the very scary and painful process of labour and childbirth, and the aftermath of stitches and bleeding and healing from all of it. And it doesn't end there: there is feeding and nappy changing and staying up all night forever, and kissing life as you know it goodbye. Sure babies are cute and a huge source of happiness, but to go through so much pain? Was it ever gonna be worth it?

I think this question has tormented all of us women especially at some point or the other in life, given that our role in the whole process is so much more than that of the father/other family members. And there is no escaping that responsibility. However, I realised that no one can make you take this step of having a baby unless you are fully ready: physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, financially etc. And when that day comes, you know it is time :)

As for me, I met my husband at MBA school, and after 3 years of courtship, we tied the knot in December 2009. After our second anniversary I started to get these "motherhood pangs". I'm serious ladies, it really does happen when the time is right. You end up going all 'awww' whenever you see babies, you develop this urge to be motherly and nurturing towards everyone. Heck you could even start dreaming about babies! And being in India, married, in late 20s, there are enough people around you asking about the 'good news' all the time, to ensure top of mind recall. I was 28, ready in all aspects, and since I wanted 2 children I thought it was time we started trying for the first one. However all doesn't depend on one person, the other partner must also be on board. It took time for my husband to come around and be comfortable with this life changing decision of having a baby, but like I said, when the right time comes, everything falls into place. And by end of May 2012 we were on board and ready to begin this journey.

The first step was to go to the doctor in early June and understand our physical readiness and health for having a baby. Since I am hypertensive, hypothyroidic and diabetic, the first thing to do was to ensure everything is under control. I wasn't my ideal weight but since all the other statistics were ok, our gynecologist gave us the go-ahead, but at the same time reminded us that my health issues, and my husband's habit of drinking and smoking may prolong the time we take to conceive. We should try our best to be as healthy as possible in terms of food, exercise and habits; as well as try without any stress. We should not do any other blood or other tests. We should religiously try for 6 months and if still nothing happened, then we should come back for further testing and prognosis. So that part was sorted.

The second thing was that before I started trying I wanted to fulfil one of my dreams for a long time: to go to Ladakh. Opportunity came in mid June, and we decided that we will start trying once I'm back. And so we did. I came back by June 25th, and there we were, enjoying the whole process of making babies :) it was fun while it lasted, although I must admit there was always this fear of months and months passing without good news which made me nervous. I am an impatient person by nature, and I kept testing myself every now and then to see if I'm pregnant. It was finally on 9th August that I realised I was about a month pregnant! Phew! What a relief. I actually got pregnant in hardly 2 weeks! We just couldn't believe it! Given all my conditions, we were expecting a wait time of at least 6 months. And here we were, pregnant in a jiffy. I've seen some of my friends who are perfectly healthy, trying for months without success. So for us, getting pregnant so quickly without issues was a miracle we were very thankful for! We immediately corroborated the results with other tests and checked with the gynecologist, who was equally surprised but happy for us. We immediately told immediate family and close friends the good news, and everyone was over the moon, and full of lots of advice, as expected :) And thus started the whole rigmarole of being pregnant, eating healthy, taking multivitamins, take care of myself etc.

Its been almost 6 months since I found out and every day for me has been an adventure on this roller coaster ride called pregnancy. There have been good days, bad days, even ugly days. Happy days, sad days, frustrating days, exhilarating days. Easy days, fun days, difficult days, impossible days. But each day, feeling the baby inside me grow, has been a day to remember! Now I'm waiting with bated breath to actually meet the little one in person soon! As they say, the real adventure begins only once the lil one's out! :)